Friday, May 28, 2010

Worship Tree

Here is a picture of the tree at 8th & J Street (mentioned in a previous blogpost) before which I saw a man kneeling in what appeared to be a religious ceremony - Druid? Buddhist? Meth Hallucination? - of some sort.

To all appearances, it seems to be an ordinary, urban shade tree.

Nevertheless, one can't be too careful. As John mentioned in comments, such unusual conduct could signify terrorist intentions to which the tree was privy. So, I made a citizen's arrest, and read the tree its Miranda warning:
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you. Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?
Predictably, the tree clammed up and said nothing. What's worse, since the tree grows in the bail bonds district of Sacramento, and since a bail bondsman was just around the corner, the tree never even entered jail, but posted a few green leaves and remains free with its other fellow urban shade trees, in mute, flagrant defiance.

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