Monday, October 26, 2009

"You Become The Pig"

This sounds like fun - being a chainsaw-wielding pig at Universal Studios' Halloween Horror Nights:
During my first solo attempt at attacking the passing Terror Tram, I failed badly. It took five tugs to start the chainsaw. Flustered, I rushed out to the tram and flailed aimlessly at the confused passengers. The long hair from the mask covered my face, obscuring my view. I stumbled on a fallen branch. Nobody was scared.

Winded and defeated, I plodded back into the woods and plopped down on the log.
“Any advice?” I asked Cullen.

“You’ve got to rev the engine more,” he said, in apt understatement.

I watched Cullen and Vawtor, studying their technique: the hidden sound of the rip-snorting engine chortling to life, the frightening sudden charge toward the tram, the lunging and lurching swings of the saw from a menacing crouched position. It was like a choreographed dance of death and destruction that lasted only 15 seconds.

As the night progressed, my scare skills improved.

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