Thursday, February 04, 2010

Bureaucracy

E.: MMMMAAAAARRRRCCCC! Help me understand this form!

M.: It's a medical records release authorization form.

E.: One of the girls at school was pushed by a boy. She fell and broke her wrist, and she needs a doctor's note to be excused from PE.

M.: So you need to fill out a medical records release authorization form in order to ask a doctor for a note for her to be excused from PE?

E.: Yes.

M.: Well, that sounds like overkill. It should be obvious that she needs to be excused from PE.

E.: I know. It's SSSOOOOO stupid! Things used to be nicer at the school, but now they messed it all up. Why did they do that?

M.: Everyone wants to make sure that everyone is completely covered.

E.: What does this line mean?

M.: It's a Revocation of Authorization. It means that if the doctor decides he's released too much information regarding the fact that she has a broken wrist he can change his mind and ask for that information back (with written notice, and excusing any actions taken in the meantime in light of that information). And it looks like the doctor can tailor the release of medical records. For example, he can decide to reveal information to you regarding her wrist, but keep information about her shoulder secret.

E.: It's SSSSOOOO stupid!

M.: You should complain.

E.: MMMMAAAARRRRCCC! Did I tell you the union is going to protest at the State Capitol next week? It's the last thing I want, but I'm supposed to go protest with them!

M.: You should complain to Schwarzenegger.

E.: I will tell him: "I am the Green Destiny!" (From the film Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon):
Who am I? I am... I am the Invincible Sword Goddess, armed with the incredible Green Destiny. Be you Li or Southern Crane, lower your head and ask for mercy. I am the desert dragon. I leave no trace. Today I fly over Eu-Mei. Tomorrow... I'll kick over Wudan Mountain!
M.: And what will Schwarzenegger say?

E.: (pretending to fire a machine gun) "Hasta la vista, baby!"

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