"Oklahoma!" Opens At DMTC

(Left) 'Many A New Day,' Sunday afternoon, June 18th. Lavender (Claire Lawrence), Sun Yellow (Tawny Hansen), Strawberry (Dian Hoel), Powder Blue (Ashley Lowe), Lime Green (Bethany Pedersen), Royal Blue (Marissa Casillas). Seated on floor, Maya Rothman and Kristi Avila. Seated and standing in back, Dannette Vassar, Monique McKisson, Audrey Pan, Chelsea Beatty, Eva Cher. (Funny how it's the same pose, from a different angle, as the one I posted on Friday.)


A good opening weekend, overall. Opening night went unusually well for a DMTC show. A few light problems, and after wrassling inconclusively with the wobbly picket fence, the lights came up on Dannette while she was still onstage, but other than that, few big issues. One possible big stumbling point went well: we rechoreographed part of "Kansas City," the part prior to catching Will Parker (Brad Bong) in mid-air, but we didn't actually run through it, but just discussed it amongst ourselves, like civilized people do, but fortunately everyone got the memo, and so (mercifully for Brad) it worked.

(Left) Noel Bruening and Melissa Hasty at the concessions counter June 16th, opening night for "Oklahoma!"


On Saturday night, Steve's knee gave out on him, so stunt Ike Skidmore, Ryan Favorite, took control. Ryan had been cast in the part originally, but was replaced by Steve Isaacson when Ryan signed up to be a brutish Russian soldier in Music Circus' upcoming 'Fiddler on the Roof,' but Ryan was still available since Fiddler rehearsals haven't started yet. We didn't actually provide Ryan with page 40.5 of the script, however, so Ryan wasn't really in complete control, but more like a pawn in a pageant beyond his complete understanding, as if he were parachuted into some yahoo version of "Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead." A couple of lines got dropped during the show, and some weird stuff happened. Jamie banged his knee, and, at one point, Brad apparently sang 'Oh! Glaucoma!' instead of 'Oklahoma!'. Still, basically OK....

Sunday also went well, but a few problems there too. Monique McKisson's toe got smacked during the scene change into Jud's Smokehouse, and Claudia was ill.

Pretty successful weekend, overall, though.

Spirited and friendly cast. My favorite story of the rehearsal period involved Buffee Gillihan's struggle to master her costume for the Dream Ballet 'can-can' sequence. Amply-endowed Buffee needs a boostiere like the Pacific Ocean needs water, and she grew concerned at one point: "I'm afraid!" soprano Buffee exclaimed. In spontaneous bass unison, Andy Hyun and myself intoned, "I'm not."

Backstage humor seems to be more sophisticated than during "Titanic," an evolution that has more to do with Steven Ross' changing tastes than any particular development among the rest of us. There are fewer of the grisly, but ever-popular dead-baby jokes, and more jokes along the lines of AOL's 'you've got mail' slogan:

What did King Arthur's computer tell him? You've got grail.

Cleverness with these jokes is limited by the number of words rhyming with 'mail.' My favorite creation so far:

What did the gold miner's computer tell him? You've got shale.

The cast is struggling to keep 'Family-Guy' humor out of the show. Colorado-inspired humor is a different matter, though, namely humor inspired by the animated television show "South Park." In the auction scene one night, instead of a bid for "three fifty" for Laurie's basket, Michael McElroy actually bid "tree fitty", which derives from South Park episode number 303, Chef's Mama:

Chef's dad: Well, aren't you crackers just cute as the dickens?
Stan: You're Chef's parents?
Chef's mom: Yes, all his life.
Kyle: We have to talk to him!
Chef's dad: Well, he should be out now directly.
Chef's mom: Oh, he's so excited about the wedding now.
Chef's dad: Say, would you crackers like to hear about the time we saw the Loch Ness monster?
Stan: No, that's okay.
Chef's dad: Ooh, it must've been about seven, eight years ago. Me and the little lady was out on this boat, you see, all alone at night, when all of a sudden this huge creature, this giant crustacean from the paleolithic era, comes out of the water.
Chef's mom: We was so scared, Lord have mercy, I jumped up in the boat and I said "Thomas, what on earth is that creature?!"
Thomas: It stood above us looking down with these big red eyes,-
Chef's mom: Oh, it was so scary!
Thomas: -and I yelled. I said, "What do you want from us, monster?!" And the monster bent down and said, "…Uh I need about tree-fitty." [a long silence follows]
Kyle: What's tree-fitty?
Thomas: Three dollars and fifty cents.
Chef's mom: Tree-fitty.
Stan: He wanted money?
Thomas: That's right. I said "I ain't giving you no tree-fitty you goddamn Loch Ness monster! Get your own goddamn money!"
Chef's mom: I gave him a dollar.
Thomas: She gave him a dollar.
Chef's mom: I thought he'd go away if I gave him a dollar.
Thomas: Well of course he's not gonna go away, Nellie! You gave him a dollar, he's gonna assume you got more!

......

[Chef's house. Thomas is still telling the story…]
Thomas: And that was the third time we saw the Loch Ness monster. Then one time, I believe it was July-
Nellie: August.
Thomas: -August. There's a knock on the door. I open it, and there's this cute little girl scout-
Nellie: And she was so adorable, with the little pig tails and all.
Thomas: -And she says to me, "How would you like to buy some cookies?" And I said "Well, what kind do you have?" She had thin mints, graham crunchy things-
Nellie: Raisin oatmeal.
Thomas: -Raisin oatmeal, and I said "We'll take a graham crunch. How much will that be?" And she looks at me and she says, "…Uh I need about tree-fitty."
Nellie: …Tree-fitty.
Thomas: Well, it was about that time that I notice that girl scout was about eight stories tall and was a crustacean from the protozoic era.
Nellie: The Loch Ness monster.
Thomas: I said, "Dammit monster! Get off my lawn! I ain't giving you no tree-fitty!" It said, "how about just two-fitty?" I said, "Oh, now it's only two-fitty!! What?! Is there a sale on Loch Ness munchies or something?!"
Nellie: Lord, he was angry.
Thomas: Damn right, I was angry!
Nellie: Not you, the monster. He was about to kick your ass.
Thomas: Aah, shut your mouth, woman!
Stan: Uh, could you just tell Chef we were here?
Thomas: Sure. That crazy old monster [Stan, Kyle, and Kenny walk out] Now, then the fourth time I saw the…

.......

Thomas: Oh, I remember when Chef was just a three-year-old little man. He came running up to me with a big smile and his little chef's hat on, and he said, "Poppa, poppa!" I said "What do you need, Chef, my boy?", and he said, "…I need about tree-fitty."
Nellie: …Tree-fitty.
Thomas: Well, it was about that time I got suspicious. I said, "Chef, why do you need tree-fitty?" He said, "My imaginary friend Goo-Goo the dinosaur wants it." I went to my son's room, and sure enough, there was the Loch Ness monster!
Nellie: Oh, it was scary!
Thomas: I said, "Dammit monster! You stop bugging my children now! We work for our money in this house and we don't give money away!"
Thomas: So I chased the monster down the street, you see…
.....

Thomas: [telling his tale to Randy and Sharon] …And then these aliens had me up on their ship, right? They was probing me and all that.
Nellie: We had taco salad that night.
Thomas: Don't matter what we had for dinner woman! Now this alien had a big head and big black eyes, and it was all bent over me. I said, "What do you want from me, alien?!" and do you know what he said?
Nellie: Tree-fitty.
Thomas: Uh. Let me tell the damn story now! He said, "tree-fitty." And so I realized I that it wasn't no alien, it was that God-damned Loch Ness monster again, trying to trick me into giving him tree-fitty by dressing up like an alien. Don't that just beat all?!
Nellie: I had just given him tree-fitty the week before.
Thomas: What?! You gave that monster another damn tree-fitty?!
Nellie: [somewhat defensive] He tricked me.
Thomas: Well no wonder the damn monster keeps coming back to our house! You keep giving it tree-fitty!

.....
[The optometrist's office. Cartman walks in with a large ice box. His bandages are off. Now we know why he wasn't at school with Stan and Kyle.]
Dr. Lott: Oh, hello, piggy. How are your eyes doing?
Cartman: After today they're gonna be fine, and I'll never have to see you ever again!
Dr. Lott: I don't think that's possible, piggy, not with your eyes.
Cartman: No, not with my eyes. With these! [takes Kenny's frozen head out of the box to show the eyes] Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Dr. Lott: Was he an organ donor?
Cartman: Eh-sure.
Dr. Lott: All right, then let's get to work. [Cartman gets in the chair, and the optometrist pulls out Kenny's left eye] Say, you don't have three dollars and fifty cents on you, do you?

Little did I know that Michael McElroy (and not Ryan Favorite) is an eight-story tall crustacean from the Proterozoic Era!