Thomas Friedman Satire On Iraq

Hilarious! Suck on it!:

Friedman, who likes his countries like he likes his women: hot, dry, and financially liquid, seems to have a real war boner for Iraq.

Back in 2003 he explained that there was this bubble, you see. And it was kind of like the tech bubble, but not quite. It was a terrorism bubble and, instead of being full of pet.com or webvan.com or hotnakedphyllisschlafly.com, it was full of swarthy people with box cutters who hated our freedom and our open society and our innate God-given goodness.
Also, probably our Apple products.

One version “claims” that the swarthy-muslimy bubble burst on 9/11/2001 and that is what brought downt the Twin Towers (it was in all the papers, you can look it up).

Another, more logical, version has it that there was a super-secret conspiracy involving the NSA, CIA, FBI, NYPD, FDNY, all branches of the U.S. Armed Forces including the Coast Guard which is totally one too — so stop laughing, the Bilderberg Group, Disney, Cinnabon, and HBO to destroy the U.S. Economy by melting the steel reinforcing the towers using an underground Volcano Machine developed by Northrop Grumman, GE, and Build-a-Bear and housed in Building 7.

Both of those are equally plausible depending upon your daily lead intake.

...Shorter Tom Friedman: We broke it, you bought it. Get back to me in six months [Friedman unit]. Until then …. suck on it.

Meanwhile, I wish this was satire, but it isn't: