Rampant Narcissism

Jerry writes:

Finally, we have an explanation for everything that's wrong with society: rampant narcissism!

Actually, there may be a lot to blaming our troubles on narcissism.

I wonder if this example is narcissism, or just there-but-for-the-grace-of-God-go I?:

A North Carolina woman reportedly dumped an elderly relative at a shelter in Bradenton on the way to Walt Disney World.

Beverly Edwards is said to have dropped her aunt, Ruth Smith, at a Salvation Army homeless shelter Sunday evening — while indicating that she would not be returning to pick up the 96-year-old.

Edwards, who told staff at the shelter that she could no longer care for the elderly woman, then traveled on a family vacation to Disney World. Details of her trip were not available.

Salvation Army personnel at the shelter would not comment Friday.

"This seems like a rather extraordinary and extreme case," said Jon Peck, a spokesman for the Florida Department of Elder Affairs. "Dropping an elder and running is definitely not the best way to protect the interests of the elder."

This example sounds a little like my boss when I lived in Utah:

A recent study titled "Leader Emergence: The Case of the Narcissistic Leader" describes how narcissists have skills and qualities—confidence, extraversion, a desire for power—that propel them into leadership roles but that when true narcissists are in charge, other aspects of their makeup—a feeling the rules don't apply to them, a need for constant stroking—can have "disastrous consequences." Yes, we're talking about you, former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich. After Blagojevich was caught on tape trying to sell a Senate seat, he reveled in the opportunity to appear on talk shows, making the case that he himself was a victim—self-pity being a favorite narcissist refuge.

A line from a New York Times profile of him is as trenchant a description of narcissism as is found in most psychology textbooks: "[He] is unapologetically late to almost everything, and can treat employees with disdain, cursing and erupting in fury for failings as mundane as neglecting to have at hand at all times his preferred black Paul Mitchell hairbrush." There it all is: the sense that other people don't matter, the belief others are instruments for the narcissist's use, the self-admiration.

Actually I've been surrounded by narcissists all my life. Maybe that's why I ended up helping run a theater - life would seem empty without that special emphasis on 'me':

People with NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) act as if they are special beings who are exceptionally intelligent, accomplished, beautiful, or sexy (or all of the above), to whom lesser people (pretty much everyone else) must bow. For example, the late real estate heiress Leona Helmsley did time in prison for her belief about herself and her husband, "We don't pay taxes. Only little people pay taxes."

And this example sounds like E.:

Those involved with someone with NPD frequently say they feel as if they are interacting with a kindergartener. In some way they are. According to a study in the journal Advances in Psychiatric Treatments, narcissists are stuck with the emotional development of 5-year-olds. It's about at age 5 that children start realizing their feelings are not just the result of other people or events but occur within themselves, and that they have control over them. But this understanding does not take place for the narcissist, who continues to see all internal states as having an external cause. Because of narcissists' inability to control their own emotions, they unconsciously experience the world as constantly threatening—thus the tendency toward inexplicable rages, the wild overreactions to the slightest perception of criticism.

Jerry recommends these examples from computer-land:

This page is a riot!

Oddly enough, while amusing, I find the examples on this Web site insufficiently-narcissistic. Maybe it's because I'm inured to narcissistic behavior or maybe it's because I'm naturally an enabler, I find the examples just run-of-the-mill consumer society stuff.

Yesterday at the sandwich shop, it seemed the three stoners in line in front of me were just clueless. Their remarks were juvenile, they couldn't decide what to order, and they behaved selfishly. After they left, I talked to the manager, who shook his head as he gazed at the departing social menaces and said:

I've worked in customer service all over the world, but I've never seen animals like this until I got here to the United States.

Uncharitable, perhaps, but the unnarcissistic majority eventually do get their revenge against the narcissistic minority.