Just Don't

A few travel tips:

In the South Pacific, don't tell people they live in paradise.

In Paraguay, don't say your least favorite musical instrument is the harp.

In Italy, don't order cappuccino after 11 a.m.

In Japan, don't blow your nose.

In Spain, don't pick up your paper napkin if you drop it at the bar.

In Ecuador, don't spray paint graffiti on the Equator.

In England, don't touch the queen.

In Thailand, don't badmouth the king.

In Vatican City, don't correct the pope.

In Morocco, don't always listen to the man in the street.

In Iran, don't approach women in the street.

In Chile, don't say you've always dreamed of driving cross-country.

In Uruguay, don't tell people you're enjoying your stay in Paraguay. (Similar rule for Sweden and Switzerland, Slovakia and Slovenia, Niger and Nigeria, Macedonia and Mesopotamia.)

In Latvia, don't say your least favorite sport is ice hockey.

In France, if you're a male, don't go to a public swimming pool without a Speedo.

In Mexico, don't ask mariachis to play "Oye Como Va."

In Russia, don't stand with your hands in your pockets.

In Kazakhstan, don't mention Borat.

In Vietnam, don't say pho with a long "O" when ordering the popular noodle soup. (It's pronounced more like `fuh').

In Ireland, don't ask, "Are there any good books by local authors?"

And whatever you do, wherever you go, never say you don't like soccer.