Lawsuit: D'oh, Or Not D'oh?

I can't tell if these authors are committing publishing suicide (by overestimating their own popularity), or have a reasonable beef that needs correction. I suppose I should be on the side of the plaintiffs (fight the man!), but I think it would be better, in this case, if the litigiousness bankrupts everyone involved:

Five authors have sued the parent company of Regnery Publishing, a Washington imprint of conservative books, charging that the company deprives its writers of royalties by selling their books at a steep discount to book clubs and other organizations owned by the same parent company.

In a suit filed in United States District Court in Washington yesterday, the authors Jerome R. Corsi, Bill Gertz, Lt. Col. Robert (Buzz) Patterson, Joel Mowbray and Richard Miniter state that Eagle Publishing, which owns Regnery, “orchestrates and participates in a fraudulent, deceptively concealed and self-dealing scheme to divert book sales away from retail outlets and to wholly owned subsidiary organizations within the Eagle conglomerate.”

...In the lawsuit the authors say that Eagle sells or gives away copies of their books to book clubs, newsletters and other organizations owned by Eagle “to avoid or substantially reduce royalty payments to authors.”

...“They’ve structured their business essentially as a scam and are defrauding their writers,” Mr. Miniter said in an interview, “causing a tremendous rift inside the conservative community.”

...In Regnery’s case, according to the lawsuit, the publisher sells books to sister companies, including the Conservative Book Club, which then sells the books to members at discounted prices, “at, below or only marginally above its own cost of publication.” In the lawsuit the authors say they receive “little or no royalty” on these sales because their contracts specify that the publisher pays only 10 percent of the amount received by the publisher, minus costs — as opposed to 15 percent of the cover price — for the book.

Mr. Miniter said that meant that although he received about $4.25 a copy when his books sold in a bookstore or through an online retailer, he only earned about 10 cents a copy when his books sold through the Conservative Book Club or other Eagle-owned channels. “The difference between 10 cents and $4.25 is pretty large when you multiply it by 20,000 to 30,000 books,” Mr. Miniter said. “It suddenly occurred to us that Regnery is making collectively jillions of dollars off of us and paying us a pittance.” He added: “Why is Regnery acting like a Marxist cartoon of a capitalist company?”

In an e-mail statement, Bruce W. Sanford, a lawyer with Baker Hostetler, a Washington firm representing Eagle and Regnery, said: “No publisher in America has a more acute marketing sense or successful track record at building promotional platforms for books than Regnery Publishing. These disgruntled authors object to marketing strategies used by all major book publishers that have proved successful time and again as witnessed by dozens of Regnery bestsellers.”

...The authors argue that because at least a quarter and as much as half of their book sales are diverted to nonretail channels, sales figures of their books on Nielsen BookScan, which tracks about 70 percent of retail sales but does not reflect sales through book clubs and other outlets used by Eagle, are artificially low. Publishers use these figures when determining future book deals, and the authors argue that actions by Eagle and Regnery have long-term effects on their careers.

...Joel Mowbray, author of “Dangerous Diplomacy: How the State Department Threatens America’s Security,” said he was particularly disappointed in Regnery and Eagle because they had so championed conservative authors. “These guys created the conservative book market,” Mr. Mowbray said. “Before them, conservatives were having to fight, generally unsuccessfully, to get books published.”

Lowbrow Vegas - Embrace The Cheese

A fun guide to things Vegas, divided into highbrow Vegas and lowbrow Vegas. Each has its charms. A few of the lowbrow highlights:

BIG ELVIS (Bill's Gamblin' Hall and Saloon) A super-sized hunk of burning love, Big Elvis represents -- in fact, magnifies (he's much larger than Elvis ever was) -- the King's final years. Backed by a drum machine, and (when he's not seated on a massive throne), shaking like a bowl full of jelly, B.E. (Pete Vallee) masterfully croons and rocks his way through the legend's biggest hits. One lucky audience member gets picked to play "Little Elvis," which consists of strumming an inflatable guitar while wearing aviator shades and a bad wig. How lowbrow is that? Best of all, it's free! http://www.billslasvegas.com/

LITTLE LEGENDS (Harmony Theater at Krave) Simply put, little people impersonate a bevy of music's superstars (and Milli Vanilli). If you think it's just novelty, though, think again. The twins who take on Michael Jackson and Terra Jole, who belts out numbers by Alanis and Madonna (among others), are knockouts. A bit long on the snarky, standard-sized host, but even he grew on us.(702) 836-0836

ATOMIC TESTING MUSEUM No ironic space-age wackiness here. The Smithsonian's sober guide to the nearby Nevada Test Site (blasts routinely shook downtown) features techie science explainers, a great photo exhibit by L.A. filmmaker Peter Kuran and bomb-blast simulations in the Ground Zero Theater. http://www.atomictestingmuseum.org/

LIBERACE MUSEUM Celebrities are so boring nowadays: None of them can hold a candle(abra) to Liberace, who didn't just tickle the ivories, he tickled them pink. The befeathered, jewel-laden costumes and customized luxury cars on display here still have the power to make jaws drop. But what really made him sparkle wasn't his bling, it was his 24-carat charisma, as the video footage of "Mr. Entertainment" on endless loop in the gift shop shows. And with an adult admission price of only $12.50, this museum is one of the best bargains in town. http://www.liberace.org/

THE TANK (Golden Nugget) You're flying through a long tube, mostly nude, as gambling tables flash past, then you drop through a mess of real 6-foot sharks and are dumped, squealing, into the drink. No, it's not another night at the poker table, it's this clever new three-story water slide and upscale strategy of the Nugget on Fremont Street. http://www.goldennugget.com/

BITE (Stratosphere Hotel) Topless dancing vampires! Need we say more? Bite has a plot, in the loosest sense of the word: A man in a puffy shirt lords over a coven of dancing lady-vampires with white fangs and sparkly thongs who dance to a lot of classic rock. Because vampires love Styx. Thoroughly embraces the cheese.http://www.stratospherehotel.com/

THUNDER FROM DOWN UNDER (Excalibur Hotel) When you watch a chiseled Australian in a black banana hammock pour beer all over himself, leap onto a table full of screaming women, rip the glasses off of a mother's face and shine them provocatively on the front of his thong, you have to ask yourself: Why don't I go to male strip revues more often?http://www.thunderdownunder.com/

Monsoonal-Type Antipodean November Weather

Interior thunderstorms seem to have arrived in portions of Australia, more-or-less on-schedule (unlike last year). Thunderstorm rainfall is always mercuric - big falls here, nothing at all over there - but at least some areas far inland, in Queensland, NSW, and West Australia, are seeing welcome rain.

Things seem awfully dry farther south, in Victoria, however.

Bankruptcy Reform Begins To Boomerang

You can't get blood from a turnip, and even the most lop-sided legislation ever passed (in 2005) can't change that fact. The last sentence here is the real killer. Of course "our consciences can handle the number of foreclosures we'll see if they do nothing". This is America, after all, where bad things happen all the time to good people, and where millions of families already live, more-or-less unnoticed, more-or-less on the street. Millions more? We'll shrug our shoulders and move on.:

Nov. 8 (Bloomberg) -- Washington Mutual Inc. got what it wanted in 2005: A revised bankruptcy code that no longer lets people walk away from credit card bills.

The largest U.S. savings and loan didn't count on a housing recession. The new bankruptcy laws are helping drive foreclosures to a record as homeowners default on mortgages and struggle to pay credit card debts that might have been wiped out under the old code, said Jay Westbrook, a professor of business law at the University of Texas Law School in Austin and a former adviser to the International Monetary Fund and the World Bank.

``Be careful what you wish for,'' Westbrook said. ``They wanted to make sure that people kept paying their credit cards, and what they're getting is more foreclosures.''

Washington Mutual, Bank of America Corp., JPMorgan Chase & Co. and Citigroup Inc. spent $25 million in 2004 and 2005 lobbying for a legislative agenda that included changes in bankruptcy laws to protect credit card profits, according to the Center for Responsive Politics, a non-partisan Washington group that tracks political donations.

The banks are still paying for that decision. The surge in foreclosures has cut the value of securities backed by mortgages and led to more than $40 billion of writedowns for U.S. financial institutions. It also reached to the top echelons of the financial services industry.

...People are putting their credit card payments ahead of their mortgages, said Richard Fairbank, chief executive officer of Capital One Financial Corp., the largest independent U.S. credit card issuer. Of customers who are at least three months late on their mortgage payments, 70 percent are current on their credit cards, he said.

``What we conclude is that people are saying, `Honey, let the house go,''' but keep the cards, Fairbank said Nov. 5 at a conference in New York sponsored by Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc.

The new bankruptcy code makes it harder for debtors to qualify for Chapter 7, the section that erases non-mortgage debt. It shifted people who get paychecks higher than the median income for their area to Chapter 13, giving them up to five years to pay off non-housing creditors.

The court-ordered payment plans fail to account for subprime loans with adjustable rates that can reset as often as every six months, said Henry Sommer, president of the National Association of Consumer Bankruptcy Attorneys. Two-thirds of debtors won't be able to complete their payback plans, according to the Center for Responsible Lending.

``We have people walking away from homes because they can't afford them even post bankruptcy,'' said Sommer, a Philadelphia- based bankruptcy attorney. ``Their mortgage rates are resetting at levels that are completely unaffordable, and there's nothing the bankruptcy process can do for them as it now stands.''

Four million subprime borrowers with limited or tainted credit histories will see their mortgage bills increase by an average 40 percent in the next 18 months, according to the National Association of Consumer Advocates in Washington. About 1.45 million of those will end up in foreclosure by the end of 2008, said Mark Zandi, chief economist at Moody's Economy.com, a research firm and unit of Moody's Corp. in New York.

...``The law had an unintended consequence of taking away a relief valve that mortgage borrowers used to have,'' said Rod Dubitsky, head of asset-backed research for Credit Suisse Holdings USA Inc. in New York. ``It's bad for the mortgage borrowers and bad for subprime investors because it means more losses.''

The Bankruptcy Abuse Prevention and Consumer Protection Act of 2005 was the biggest overhaul to the code in more than a quarter of a century. The old law, the Bankruptcy Reform Act of 1978 that was signed by President Jimmy Carter, had loosened requirements for debt forgiveness.

...Congress may soon take action to ``reform the bankruptcy reform,'' Zandi said. The House Judiciary Committee is working on legislation to let bankruptcy judges restructure home loans by lowering interest rates and reducing mortgage balances to reflect current market value.

Banks including Washington Mutual, Citigroup and Wells Fargo & Co. sent a letter to the committee opposing the change, saying such restructurings should be done privately.

...So far, most lenders have been reluctant to change loan agreements. About 1 percent of mortgages that reset in January, April and July were modified, according to a Sept. 21 Moody's Investors Service report that surveyed 16 subprime lenders that account for 80 percent of the market.

Congress probably will approve at least a limited measure to permit loan modifications, said Westbrook, the University of Texas law professor.

``They are going to have to figure out some way to address the problem,'' Westbrook said. ``I don't think our economy or our consciences can handle the number of foreclosures we'll see if they do nothing.''

Boo Boo Visits Gibson

The same species!:

Despite their radical difference in size, these two dogs have something in common - Gibson the Great Dane and Boo Boo the toy Chihuahua are both world record holders.

Measuring a whopping 107cm, gentle giant Gibson was named tallest dog back in 2004. Joining him in the hall of fame for 2007 is tiny Boo Boo who only measures 10.16cm tall and is smaller than Gibson's head.

...Boo Boo's owner Lana Elswick has bred Chihuahuas in Kentucky for 19 years and said she always knew her one-year-old pooch was special.

The tiny mutt was only about the size of a thumb when she was born; so small, in fact, that she had to be fed with an eye dropper every two hours before she could eventually nurse a bottle. Now she is a diminuitive diva.

...Owner Sandy Hall lives with her dog Gibson in Sacramento, California. The Great Dane is also the world's tallest therapy dog and regularly visits children's hospitals.

DMTC - "Brigadoon" - Wednesday Night Rehearsal

Left: "Come To Me, Bend To Me"

"Come To Me, Bend To Me"

"Come To Me, Bend To Me" - Katherine Coppola

Tommy (Brennen Cull), Fiona MacLaren (Caitlin Kiley), and Jeannie MacLaren (Katherine Coppola).

Mr. Lundie (Arthur Vassar) and Fiona MacLaren (Caitlin Kiley).

Do I post this? Do I not post this? Do I post this? Do I not post this? Mmmm..... I think I will post this.....

Michael McElroy as Jeff.....

Another Bad Day On Wall Street

Credit troubles and high oil prices. The bad times will last awhile - six months at least, given the subprime mortgage reset schedule:

Wall Street today suffered one of its worst routs since the global credit crunch began, as financial stocks were hammered again and a fresh plunge in the dollar deepened concerns about the U.S. economic outlook.

The Dow Jones industrials sank 360.92 points, or 2.6%, to 13,300.02, amid a broad market decline.

The Standard & Poor's 500 index lost 44.65 points, or 2.9%, to 1,475.62. It was the biggest one-day decline for the S&P index since February, surpassing even the worst days in August, when the credit crunch rooted in the housing market's woes began to spark heavy selling of stocks.

Falling stocks outnumbered winners by a stunning 10 to 1 on the New York Stock Exchange.

...Investors' fears have been compounded by streaking oil prices, which are threatening to top the $100-a-barrel mark. The price eased a bit today, however, to $96.37 a barrel.

And the dollar has continued to sink, raising the risk that foreign investors -- who have funded a huge amount of U.S. borrowing -- could grow tired of seeing their holdings devalued and could balk at buying more American securities.

The dollar crumbled today after Chinese officials suggested the country might sell dollar-denominated securities to diversify its foreign-currency reserves.

"We will favor stronger currencies over weaker ones, and will readjust accordingly," Cheng Siwei, vice chairman of China's National People's Congress, said at a conference in Beijing, Bloomberg News reported.

...Despite today's losses, major stock indexes still are in the black for the year. The Dow is up 6.7%, and the S&P 500 is up 4%.

DMTC - "Brigadoon" - Tuesday Night Rehearsal

Left: Fiona (Caitlin Kiley) and Tommy (Brennen Cull).

Left: Fiona (Caitlin Kiley) and Tommy (Brennen Cull).


Left: Jean MacLaren (Katherine Coppola) in "Come To Me, Bend To Me".

Left: "Come To Me, Bend To Me".


Left: Charlie Dalrymple (J.R. Humbert) in "Come To Me, Bend To Me".

Left: Harry Beaton (Tony Gabrielson) and Archie MacLaren (Steve Isaacson).

Left: Meg Brockie (Lauren Miller) and Jeff (Michael McElroy).

Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm, Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm, Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm, Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm, Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm, Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm, Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm, Sturm und Drang, Drang und Sturm

Uncertainty In Tucson

About U of A basketball coach Lute Olsen:

Several recruiting analysts said the vague nature of Olson's departure Sunday may have added to speculation about his future. He left behind a statement from a Phoenix-based public relations firm saying he was facing a personal matter that was not a "health scare."

"Any time a coach is sort of up in age, something like this is going to raise eyebrows, and you have to wonder how long he will be coaching," Rivals analyst Jerry Meyer said. Recruits could think "'Will he be there all four years?' But it's a little early to tell because you don't know what is going on."

Al-Jazeera Annoys Al-Qaeda

Seems like everyone has a media complaint these days:

The main charge being leveled against al-Jazeera, in fact, is that its presentation of the tape was fundamentally misleading because it made it seem like he was talking about al-Qaeda's mistakes and misfortunes when the full tape makes quite clear that he wasn't - he was offering advice and praise to all mujahideen, which to these interpreters was the whole point. There's also a lot of anger out there that the people who made their instant analyses based on the al-Jazeera version haven't come forward and changed their public views. Ah, media criticism and bashing pundits- the common glue which binds together internet activists across cultures and political divides.

Animal Paranoia

Times in Iraq are tough:

A 2m shark has been caught in a river in southern Iraq more than 200km from the sea - prompting locals to accuse American troops of dumping it there.

Karim Hasan Thamir said he was fishing with his sons last week when they spotted a large fish thrashing about in his net.

"I recognised the fish as a shark because I have seen one on a television programme," he said.

...Dr Mohamed Ajah, assistant dean of the college of science at Thi Qar University in Nassiriya, said barriers in river estuaries usually prevented sharks swimming upstream.

"In this case, I think this animal was there for a long time but no one had managed to see it," he said.

Locals blamed the US military for the shark's presence.

Tahseen Ali, a teacher, said there was a "75 per cent chance" Americans had put the shark in the water.

"This is very frightening for us. Our children always swim in the river and I believe that there are more sharks. I believe that America is behind this matter," Mr Ali said.

British forces in Iraq were blamed for the alleged discovery of killer badgers who preyed on Iraqis - although the British have denied any such treachery and doubt that such creatures even exist.

And Iran's so-called intelligence service claimed allied forces in the Gulf were fitting surveillance devices to squirrels to act as miniature spies.

The World Of John Waters

He wants to make a movie about Larry Craig? Please! Stop! Now!

But this is funny:

Q Anyway, surprising ideas. The question then is, does it get harder --

A No, every day I'm inspired by things. I live in Baltimore, that always inspires me. Things happen to me in my daily life that are funny every day. I was in a bar in Baltimore and I asked a guy what he did for a living. He said, "Can I be frank? I trade deer meat for crack." I can't think that up. I could think of three movies about him. I mean, does he wait at a deer crossing sign and gun it when he needed a fix? It takes a while to get deer meat so you have to plan ahead, which isn't what most junkies do. Little things like that, anything can inspire me.

Another Big Fog Crash

Once again, near Fresno. I used to study these things, and I have a list of previous fog calamities. I need to keep a list because these accidents happen so damn often, and it's so easy to forget the anonymous dead. It's sad to add another event to the list:

Two people were killed and dozens injured in the massive pileup Saturday morning involving more than 100 cars and trucks, the California Highway Patrol said. Officials identified one victim as Travis Rogers, 26, and a 5-year-old boy, who were traveling in separate vehicles.

CHP Officer Paul Solorzano Jr. described the scene as "something out of a movie, walking up and seeing all the cars mangled and crushed."

Amy Winehouse In Berlin

Watch out! :

"About 90 minutes before the show, Snoop (Dogg) said he wanted to see Amy. When we got there, she was in a bad way. Everyone, including her management, just stood there as she threw spaghetti on the walls. She then started kicking the walls and throwing whatever she could get her hands on - even the tables and chairs. Then she started cutting up the rug. Snoop was just standing there open-mouthed, he couldn't believe what he was seeing." Amy's team have no idea what triggered her rage.

Uncovering The Ship Graveyard At Pisa

Some interesting ships have sunk there over the millenia:

So far the excavation has turned up 39 ancient shipwrecks buried under nine centuries of silt, which preserved extraordinary artifacts. The copper nails and ancient wood are still intact, and in many cases cargo is still sealed in the original terra cotta amphorae, the jars used for shipment in the ancient world. They have also found a cask of the ancient Roman fish condiment known as garum and many mariners' skeletons—one crushed under the weight of a capsized ship. One ship carried scores of pork shoulder hams; another carried a live lion, likely en route from Africa to the gladiator fights in Rome.

...Researchers say that starting around the 6th century B.C. the cargo docks of the port of Pisa were accessed by a canal that made a loop connecting the harbor to the open sea. Every hundred years or so over the course of nearly a thousand years, tsunamilike waves violently flooded the waterway and capsized and buried ships, their cargo and their passengers and crew, alongside uprooted trees and even tiny birds and animals.

...Studying the oldest boats' contents and the way those ships were built, archeologists now better understand just who the Romans and Etruscans traded with and how they lived and utilized the Mediterranean Sea. Some of the oldest ships belonged to the Greeks and the Phoenicians, which implies that the mysterious and little-understood Etruscans were in fact active traders. One ship carried amphorae sealed with sand from both Spain and from the volcanic regions of Campania in Italy, giving scientists vital clues to where these ships traveled.

Other ships carried various types of cutlery and crockery, from utilitarian ware used by the seamen to more expensive, signed pieces. None of the vessels examined so far were warships, and back then passenger boats did not exist. Researchers have concluded that it was common practice for wealthy citizens to effectively rent space on cargo ships, which explains why some of the vessels had expensive personal effects obviously not belonging to the crews. One boat thought to be a 15-yard riverboat was found still moored to a sunken pile with perfectly preserved rope. It contained a wide range of personal belongings, from fine jewelry and hand-carved pottery to simple tools. One of the rowing benches on this ship still bears the faint inscription, in the Greek alphabet, of the word akedo, the Latin word for seagull, which is believed to have been the name of the ship. Another ship, known as the Chiatta, was capsized in a storm and lies upside down, perfectly preserving the mast and upper reaches of the boat.

It's Tough Having A Loser Currency

People can't wait to unload it:

Gisele Bundchen wants to remain the world's richest model and is insisting that she be paid in almost any currency but the U.S. dollar.

Like billionaire investors Warren Buffett and Bill Gross, the Brazilian supermodel, who Forbes magazine says earns more than anyone in her industry, is at the top of a growing list of rich people who have concluded that the currency can only depreciate because Americans led by President George W. Bush are living beyond their means.

Even after the dollar lost 34 percent since 2001, the biggest investors and most accurate forecasters say it will weaken further as home sales fall and the Federal Reserve cuts interest rates. The dollar plummeted to its lowest ever last week against the euro, Canadian dollar, Chinese yuan and the cheapest in 26 years against the British pound.

``We've told all of our clients that if you only had one idea, one investment, it would be to buy an investment in a non-dollar currency,'' said Gross, the chief investment officer of Pacific Investment Management Co. in Newport Beach, California, and manager of the world's biggest bond fund. ``That should be on top of the list,'' said Gross, whose firm is a unit of Munich- based insurer Allianz SE.

The dollar fell 0.8 percent last week and touched $1.4528 per euro, the weakest since the euro's debut in 1999. It traded at $1.4484 at 9:37 a.m. in New York. The dollar lost 2.8 percent last week to 93.47 Canadian cents and 1.8 percent to $2.09 per British pound. The Fed's U.S. Trade Weighted Major Currency Index measuring the dollar's performance versus seven currencies, such as Japan's, slid to a record low of 72.22.

BNP Paribas chief currency strategist Hans-Guenter Redeker, the most accurate foreign-exchange forecaster last quarter in a Bloomberg survey, said the dollar may drop to $1.50 per euro by year-end. The median estimate of 42 strategists surveyed by Bloomberg is for the currency to end the year at $1.43. Among those surveyed last week, the forecast ranges from $1.42 to $1.50.

When Bundchen, 27, signed a contract in August to represent Pantene hair products for Cincinnati-based Procter & Gamble Co., she demanded payment in euros, according to Veja, Brazil's biggest weekly magazine. She'll also get euros for the deal she reached last October with Dolce & Gabbana SpA in Milan to promote the Italian designer's new fragrance, The One, Veja reported. Bundchen earned $33 million in the year through June, Forbes reported in July.

...Buffett, whom Forbes in April ranked as the world's third- richest person behind Bill Gates and Carlos Slim, told reporters in South Korea last month that he is bearish on the U.S. currency.

``We still are negative on the dollar relative to most major currencies, so we bought stocks in companies that earn their money in other currencies,'' Buffett said Oct. 25. Buffett, 77, is chairman of Omaha, Nebraska-based Berkshire Hathaway Inc.

Jim Rogers, a former partner of investor George Soros, said last month he's selling his house and all his possessions in the U.S. currency to buy China's yuan.

``The dollar is collapsing,'' Rogers said last week in an interview. ``I'm moving to Asia because moving to Asia now is like moving to New York in 1907 or London in 1807. It's the wave of the future.''

So, Noel Became A Hurricane After All

And caused problems for the Canadians:

POST-TROPICAL STORM NOEL FINAL INFORMATION STATEMENT
ISSUED BY THE CANADIAN HURRICANE CENTRE OF ENVIRONMENT CANADA AT 6.00 PM AST SUNDAY 04 NOVEMBER 2007.

THIS WILL BE THE LAST BULLETIN ISSUED ON POST-TROPICAL STORM NOEL.

POST-TROPICAL STORM NOEL IS NOW COMPLETELY EXTRATROPICAL AND AS A RESULT CANADIAN HURRICANE CENTRE BULLETINS ARE NO LONGER NECESSARY. FURTHER INFORMATION ON THE WEATHER ASSOCIATED WITH THIS STORM CAN BE FOUND IN REGULAR BULLETINS ISSUED BY THE QUEBEC AND ATLANTIC STORM PREDICTION CENTRES AND THE NEWFOUNDLAND AND LABRADOR WEATHER OFFICE.

SYNOPTIC SUMMARY OF THE STORM...
LATE ON SATURDAY OCTOBER 27 A PERSISTENT LOW PRESSURE CENTRE ABOUT 200 KM SOUTH SOUTHEAST OF HAITI BECAME TROPICAL DEPRESSION SIXTEEN. BY SUNDAY AFTERNOON WHILE STILL WELL SOUTH OF HAITI THE TROPICAL DEPRESSION BECAME TROPICAL STORM NOEL.. THE 14TH NAMED STORM OF THE ATLANTIC HURRICANE SEASON.

OVER THE FOLLOWING DAYS NOEL TRACKED ERATICALLY THROUGH HAITI CUBA AND THE BAHAMAS... NEVER REACHING MUCH MORE THAN 90 KM/H IN SUSTAINED WINDS. HOWEVER TORRENTIAL RAINS OF MORE THAN 500 MM IN SOME CARIBBEAN COUNTRIES CLAIMED MORE THAN 100 LIVES IN FLOODING AND MUDSLIDES.

ONCE NOEL CLEARED THE BAHAMAS IT INTENSIFIED QUICKLY TO A CATEGORY ONE HURRICANE LATE THURSDAY NOVEMBER 1. SUBSEQUENTLY HURRICANE NOEL CONTINUED MOVING NORTHEAST WITH MAXIMUM SUSTAINED WINDS OF NEAR 140 KM/H. ALMOST IMMEDIATELY AFTER BECOMING A HURRICANE NOEL BEGAN TRANSITIONING TO A POST-TROPICAL STORM. DURING THIS TRANSITION IT BECAME A VERY LARGE AND POWERFUL POST-TROPICAL STORM. THE STORM CENTRE REACHED THE SOUTHWEST COAST OF NOVA SCOTIA IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS OF SUNDAY NOVEMBER 4 STILL CARRYING MAXIMUM SUSTAINED WINDS OF 140 KM/H. BY SUNDAY AFTERNOON THE STORM WAS OVER LABRADOR AND FULLY EXTRATROPICAL IN NATURE.

WEATHER IN EASTERN CANADA...
GALES MOVED INTO SOUTHWESTERN MARITIME WATERS NEAR DAWN SATURDAY NOVEMBER 3 WHILE THE STORM CENTRE WAS STILL 1100 KM SOUTHWEST OF NOVA SCOTIA. STRONG WINDS AND RAIN MOVED INTO SOUTHWESTERN MARITIMES SATURDAY AFTERNOON AND PUSHED STEADILY NORTHEASTWARD THROUGH EASTERN CANADA SATURDAY NIGHT AND SUNDAY. SNOW DEVELOPED WITH THE SYSTEM IN NORTHWESTERN NEW BRUNSWICK SOUTHEASTERN QUEBEC AND LABRADOR.

IMPACTS...
THE WORST HIT PROVINCE WAS NOVA SCOTIA WITH WIDESPREAD POWER OUTAGES.. LOCALIZED FLOODING.. UPROOTED TREES.. ROAD WASHOUTS.. AND SOME INFRASTRUCTURE DAMAGE... ESPECIALLY ALONG THE ATLANTIC COAST.

DMTC "Brigadoon" - Tech Week Starts

Left, and below: Lauren Miller (Meg Brockie) and Michael McElroy (Jeff) in "The Love Of My Life".


Pictures from Sunday night rehearsal.




Left: Brennen Cull (Tommy Albright) and Kaitlin Kiley (Fiona MacLaren) in "Almost Like Being In Love".

Left and below: Michael McElroy (Jeff) and Brennen Cull (Tommy) in "Almost Like Being In Love".


Left: J.R. Humbert as Charles Dalrymple in "Come To Me, Bend To Me".

Left and below: Katherine Coppola as Jean MacLaren in "Come To Me, Bend To Me."

Sparky Wants To Go For A Walk

And what Sparky wants, Sparky gets....

Runaway Stage Production's "Jekyll and Hyde" (or, Tev Mixes Some New Meds And Goes Feral)

Left: Tev Ditter as Dr. Jekyll (and his alter ego Edward Hyde).


Wonderful new show at RSP's 24th Street Theater!

"Jekyll and Hyde" starts in a strained place - Dr. Jekyll makes an appeal for research support to his hospital's Board of Governors, and they turn him down flat. The idealistic Dr. Jekyll is impatient with the Board's failure to recognize the duality of good and evil in human nature, and the possibility of using medications to elicit one from the other. The Board, to its great and everlasting credit, sees ethical and moral dilemmas in Dr. Jekyll's proposed research. The Board, however, has dilemmas of its own, chiefly being its own hypocritical nature - do as we say, not as we do.

Because the show starts off where most 19th Century theatricals end, in a highly idealistic, sharply-delineated, even arid zone of moral clarity, the show moves creakily forward at first. The slow, cerebral pace is a vice of most new Broadway (post-1975) shows - RSP is not at fault here. The show is lit up, however, by some excellent songs, like "Facade", and "Take Me As I Am", featuring gorgeous singing by Tev Ditter in a duet with the wonderful Norma-Jean Russell, who plays Dr. Jekyll's caring fiancee, Emma. But the show's pace is slow until......

Left: Amber Jean Moore Lazard as Lucy


....until the beautiful and sexy Amber Jean Moore, together with the sexy ensemble, take the stage in "Bring On The Men".

Amber had some wonderful songs to sing, including the power ballad "A New Life".

The unusually-capable ensemble seemed unusually well-rehearsed. Choreographer Pam Kay Lourentzos has (once-again) done a very good job! Notable standouts include Joshua James as the evil Spider, Megan Sandoval as Nellie, and Jonathan Blum as Simon Stride. Really, just a wonderfully lithe group of people!

Once Tev had started displaying his drug-induced bipolar identity issues, the show really began to rocket forward. Tev has twenty (good grief, twenty!) songs to sing in this show, including the stellar "This Is The Moment". Tev is singing just about the best he ever has, so all you Tev Ditter fans, take note and check out this show!

Left: Karen Day as Lady Beaconsfield (check out her bling!)


My understanding before the show (from talking with Karen Day several weeks before the show) was that the hospital's Board of Governors was supposed to be quite evil. Actually, I liked the Board of Governors. I mean, when the hypocritical Board member, the Bishop of Basingstoke (Patrick Coughenour) was enticed by saucy Nellie (Megan Sandoval), I understood. Wouldn't you get enticed too? It was exceedingly cruel of Edward Hyde to get all judgmental and go medieval on the Bishop, when he was just doing what comes naturally, dontcha think?







Left: Bill Trainor as Sir Danvers Carew.


Microphone and feedback issues were mercifully few in this show - another indication of an unusually well-rehearsed cast.

The only jarring note in the show was that the prerecorded voice instructing the audience to turn off its cell phones sounded remarkably like the introductory narration to the show, and so instead of an instruction to the audience not to take flash photos, as I expected, I heard instead a somber commentary of the base evil lurking in the human soul.









Left: Frank Hardin as General Lord Glossop.

I liked Michael Jones as Dr. Jekyll's loyal friend, confidant (and solicitor, as he is in real life), Gabriel John Utterson. So sad he has to resolve the unresolvable!

Robert Louis Stevenson's novel "Jekyll and Hyde" has many similarities to its fellow gothic classic, Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein."

The 19th-Century was the first to really encounter, and grapple with, the scourge of addictive, mind-altering drugs. We still haven't conquered that dark corner of the human psyche.

On a scarcely-relevant note, I am reminded of Amy Winehouse's refrain (which may as well be Dr. Jekyll's refrain):

They tried to make me go to rehab, I said 'no, no, no'
Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know
I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine
He's tried to make me go to rehab, I won't go go go

Hunting For Chichilticale (revised)

Left: Map of Southeastern Arizona


Several years ago, I picked up a big coffee-table-type book at a used book store called "To The Inland Empire," written by former Interior Secretary (under the Kennedy Administration) Stewart Udall. The book concerns the Coronado Expedition, Spain's vanguard 1540/42 exploration for gold in the American Southwest. (Interestingly, this particular 1987 volume has Udall's signature on the inside front cover).

One of the abiding mysteries of locating Coronado's exact trail in the Southwest is the identity of a prominent brick-red ruin they called Chichilticale (believed to be a Nahuatl word for "Red House"). The mystery is part of identifying the exact location where the Cibola-bound expedition departed eastwards from the San Pedro River in Arizona towards the Mogollon Rim, some distance north of the current international border.

There are a number of plausible places where an expedition can turn east - Government Draw, Texas Canyon, Tres Alamos Wash, etc., etc. even as far north as Aravaipa Canyon. One of these paths is correct. But which one? The written record is of some help, but since Coronado was in a strange land, the record is sometimes vague - even conflicting.

According to Udall's book (and assuming, for the sake of argument, that the path went through the Winchester Mountains):

Coronado's destination beyond the pass in the Winchesters was a ruin at "the foot of the cordillera" called the Chichilticale by local Indians. The exact location of this landmark is a mystery. It's eroding walls were last seen and described as "...perfectly filled with stone and mortar..." by Captain Juan de Anza in 1775; but by the time scientists began to search for it, in this century, erosion had obliterated its foundations.

The dean of southwestern archaeologists, Dr. Emil W. Haury, of the University of Arizona, has been involved in the search for the Chichilticale for sixty years. He walked over the ground with Professor Bolton in 1940 and believes it will ultimately be identified by men and women of his profession somewhere near the 76 Ranch, in the foothills of the western flank of the Pinaleno Mountains. At eighty, Dr. Haury is still excited by the riddle of the Red House. When Chichilticale is located, he says, it will enrich science and surely become a premier historic place in our national park system.

Another geography puzzle concerns the location of the nearby Chichilticale Pass, described by Juan Jaramillo. It was at this notch that the Europeans would have had their first glimpse of the region they called the despoblado. It is likely the Chichilticale Pass was part of the nineteenth-century military trail to Fort Grant, which ascended the canyon between Cedar Mountain and Cedar Springs Butte. But, again, Spanish or Indian artifacts should someday provide solid proof of this exact position of this pass in the Pinalenos.

When I first read this, I thought "This has got to be the biggest pile of horse droppings west of the Mississippi."

First, in the arid southwest, erosion takes nearly forever to obliterate anything. People's activities erode foundations considerably faster than water. No doubt, people already know the location of the Chichilticale ruin, it's just that they haven't made the connection that this particular ruin IS Chichilticale.

Secondly, Udall takes it almost as a matter of faith that the deans of southwestern archaeology were correct in asserting that Chichilticale is located at the western end of the Pinalenos, somewhere around Eagle Pass. Indian ruins are not like the mythic Scottish village of Brigadoon, disappearing for a century at a time, then to reappear again for a day in the light of dawn. Given the slow rate of decay of Indian ruins, I would maintain that if there aren't any good candidates for Chichilticale already in evidence at Eagle Pass, whether in 1940, 1987, or today, then it is unlikely that Chichilticale is to be found at Eagle Pass.

Presumably 150 years of Apache Indian wars in the region had accelerated the decay of Chichilticale, and led to the collapse of its signature brick-red walls. The ruins must still be there, however. So, as a fun project (say, in retirement) it would be nice to track these things down, and identify Chichilticale to everyone's satisfaction!

Lo, and behold, an independent researcher named Nugent Brasher, a petroleum exploration geologist living in Glenwood, N.M. (odd place for petroleum, but nevermind) reports in the latest issue of The New Mexico Historical Review (Fall 2007, Volume 82, Number 4) on his search for Chichilticale. His article is entitled "The Chichilticale Camp Of Francisco Vasquez de Coronado - Search for the Red House."

With enthusiastic energy, Brasher tramped up and down the countryside looking for Chichilticale. For the purpose of his search, in order to insulate his mind, he made a point not to read the potentially-misleading academic literature, but rather, to read a carefully-selected subset of writings directly from the expedition itself, in Spanish, and in English translation.

Brasher believes the Coronado expedition headed eastwards from the San Pedro River fairly early once it passed Miller Peak in the Huachuca Mountains, and went up Government Draw. He places Chichilticale at Kuykendall ruins, adjacent to Turkey Draw, at the western foot of the Chiricahua Mountains. Chichilticale Pass he identifies as Apache Pass, at Fort Bowie.

Brasher also assembles several lines of technical evidence indicating Kuykendall ruins is Chichilticale. The brick-red color of the fire-burnt walls of the eroded ruin is consistent with the brick-red color attributed to Chichilticale. In addition, the presence in the ruins of a specific kind of iron bolthead used in Spanish crossbows during Coronado's time (but no later), plus a period nail shank also serve as potentially-confirming evidence.

The Spaniards also indicated that the mountain range direction *bent* at Chichilticale Pass. Since the Pinalenos trend a different direction than the Chiricahuas, I always figured that's what the Spaniards meant by a bend. But at Apache Pass, the mountains are much smaller than the Pinalenos and the bend is very noticeable - and intimate. At Apache Pass, the Dos Cabezas mountains run NW/SE, and the Chiricahuas N/S! This line of evidence is circumstantial, but does strengthen Brasher's point to some extent.

The Spanish apparently associated changes in mountain range directions with changes in coastline directions. They may well have heard the California coastline extends westwards father north, and so mountain range direction changes had added significance in their minds, and were thus notable enough to record.

To me, Brasher's argument makes a lot more sense than placing the San Pedro departure point farther north. The reason comes from Coronado's own words, to Mendoza, as quoted in Udall's book, describing the despoblado after Chichilticale Pass:

To vary our past tribulations, we found no grass during the first days and encountered more dangerous passages than we had previously experienced. The horses were so exhausted they could not endure it, and, in this last desert, we lost more than previously. The way is very bad for at least thirty leagues or more through impassable mountains. But, when we had covered those thirty leagues, we found fresh rivers and grass like that of Castile.

Thirty Spanish leagues, at 2.6 miles per league, works out to be about eighty miles.

If Chichilticale Pass is at Eagle Pass, at the west end of the Pinalenos, the distance up the Calva military road to Point of Pines, AZ is only about 70 miles - likely too short for Coronado's memory. If, however, Coronado went through Apache Pass, down the San Simon Valley on the east side of Mt. Graham, and then, instead of heading up the west side of the Gila Mountains, went up Bonita Creek on the east side, then the distance is more like 100 miles - even longer if they indeed went up the Calva road. An arduous trek, even granting the chance for a rest besides the banks of the Gila River!

There is a certain line of romantic environmental thinking that grazing in the San Simon Valley was once much better (prior to the big cattle herds of the 1870's and 1880's). I'm skeptical of some of this thinking, because I doubt Arizona could ever have sustained Texas-sized cattle herds, even then. I just bet the San Simon Valley was nearly as depressing a despoblado ride then as it is today. That would, indeed, be a hard trek for more than a thousand Spaniards, and their livestock, on that saltbush flat, followed by the ascent up the Mogollon Rim!

To me, Brasher's argument has a ring of truth, a plausibility, that should require careful attention.

And I guess I'll have to do something else in retirement....

The Politics of Parsing

Communicating effectively requires some consistency!

Richer Than Croesus

And one-note wonders too:

Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton’s (D-N.Y.) top advisers, doing damage control after the candidate’s debate performance Tuesday, told supporters on a conference call Wednesday that the campaign needed more money to fight back.

Wish I Understood This Mortgage Universe Better

ABN AMRO unloaded my mortgage to CitiMortgage a couple of months ago. Even though my mortgage is a relatively-safe, fixed-rate, 15-year thing-ma-bob, the transition was so rapid it seemed like my mortgage might be some kind of hot potato, like maybe it contained antibiotic-resistant staphylococcus, or something.

Now, CitiGroup seems to be having issues. Atrios wonders if it will go "tits up".

What then for my dull thing-ma-bob? "Who Will Buy?", like they sing in "Oliver!"

Noel's Short Window Of Opportunity

Before she makes the extratropical transition:

WATER VAPOR IMAGERY SHOWS A MID-LEVEL SHORT WAVE MOVING THROUGH THE FLORIDA STRAITS AND BEGINNING TO INTERACT WITH NOEL...SIGNALING THE START OF EXTRATROPICAL TRANSITION. WITHIN ANOTHER 12 HOURS OR SO...THE SHEAR BECOMES PROHIBITIVE FOR STRENGTHENING AS A TROPICAL CYCLONE...SO THERE IS ONLY A SHORT WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY FOR NOEL TO BECOME A CANE. HOWEVER...AFTER EXTRATROPICAL TRANSITION...GLOBAL MODEL GUIDANCE SUGGESTS THAT NOEL WILL BECOME AN EXTREMELY LARGE AND POWERFUL CYCLONE.

Reaping The Whirlwind

How Orange County conservatives crippled their own fire departments, so an adequate crisis response was not possible when the fires came.

(And may come again soon, since the weather forecast calls for more high pressure for more than a week....)

Live by the tax cut, die by the tax cut....

"Everything's Cool" - A Movie About Global Warming

From Kathy, a trailer for an interesting new documentary.

(I will disable the trailer, because it fires up automatically, and therefore is annoying. The trailer is located here).

High Heels

Love them, but they have their downside:

Two women who escaped from their car when it became stuck on train tracks in Riverside overnight were killed when the train hit the vehicle and dragged it over them as they walked away, apparently struggling in their high heels, authorities said today.

...Investigators believe that shortly after midnight, a 1996 Honda Passport turned southbound from Mission Inn Avenue onto a crushed rock shoulder that parallels the train tracks and became stuck in the gravel on the train tracks while attempting a U-turn.

The two women, the car's only occupants, then got out of the car and were trying to walk back to Mission Inn Avenue when the train struck the vehicle, Frasher said.

The impact wedged the car between the train and a tall block wall that runs closely adjacent to the tracks, dragging the vehicle toward the women. The driver, 23, and her passenger, 18, were both residents of San Bernardino. They were not immediately identified, while authorities contacted their relatives.

The women were trapped between the train and the block wall and crushed by the vehicle as it was dragged over them, Frasher said.

"It appears they were in high heels and having a hard time getting away quickly with the gravel they were walking on," he said.

October Blues Extend To November

DJI really tanks today! 360 points, and plunging.

Since the ARM subprime mortgage resets peak next March, we have at least another six months of really rough going ahead.

Absentee Halloween

Because I had to race off to DMTC I didn't get to hand out Halloween candy as I preferred. Instead, I set out a chair out front on which I placed a tray of candy, with an invitation to take as much as one pleased.

When I got back, the chair and the candy were wet from the sprinkler, which had come on in the interim. At first, I thought all the candy tray was untouched, but then I noticed all the Butterfinger pieces were still there, but most of the Snickers pieces had vanished.

The ghouls of the neighborhood have made their preferences known.....

The Polar Bear Who Came To Play

Via fonkcyclist (and others), a really interesting story about a polar bear who approached a group of sled dogs, and, instead of attacking, was persuaded by the dogs to play.

Noel Changes Her Mind

Instead of Florida, she wants to go to Newfoundland.

Here I Thought It Was 2007, And Now It's 1946....

Apparently one of the "Brigadoon" cast members is ill, and so I've been tapped to substitute, as a dancer, and as an all-around kilt-wearin', caber-tossin', highland-flingin' Scottish clansman.

[Update] Apparently I'm not to substitute after all, but rather to serve as an extra xy chromosome on stage. The cast is a bit estogen-rich, and therefore kilt-starved, and so the more guys, the merrier.

Cheryl Bly-Chester Is Running Again!

Republican Cheryl Bly-Chester was among the most-effective of the candidates who ran in the 2003 California Gubernatorial Recall Election. Following 2003, she was appointed by Governor Schwarzenegger to the Department of Conservation and the California Mining and Geology Board.

As of October 26th, Cheryl is running for California's 4th District Assembly (comprised of most of Placer County, most of El Dorado County, all of Alpine county, and part of Sacramento County). Cheryl is jockeying to fill the seat of current 4th District Assembly member Ted Gaines, who presumably will be running for John Doolittle's Congressional seat next fall. Cheryl's likely opponent for Gaine's seat will be Christian radio talk show host Eric Hogue.

What distinguishes Cheryl Bly-Chester from other conservative Republicans is her ability to seek out fresh, heterodox approaches to fixing our political problems. Her engineering-oriented problem-solving mindset allows her to see beyond outmoded rigid ideological categories and allows her to work with the motliest kinds of crew (meaning other Californians) for the optimum solution to any given problem.

Here's to Cheryl and her campaign! Contribute, if at all possible!

Slipping Into Normalcy

Drought-stricken Australia seems to have had close-to-a-normal month of October rainfall. NSW and Victoria (and eastern Tasmania) got less than normal, but the cold front that will pass through over the next couple of days should remove a good chunk of NSW from the less-than-normal category.

Strong thunderstorms on Sunday placed some portions of Queensland above normal. Schizophrenic Tasmania has seen lots of rain in the west this month.

Hopefully the drought will begin to ease. The Southern Oscillation Index is now at a value of about four - mild La Nina conditions that are, at least, not unfavorable for rain. And the summer rainy season should begin to make itself evident soon.

So, What's Wrong With Privatizing Government?

Just that there are some things government does that cannot bear interruption, particularly by surly contractors that want to get paid:

The Army manager and his assistant wondered if KBR could really do this. If soldiers or officers tried to pull this same stunt in the old Army, the general would court-martial them, and they could be sent to prison. However, according to federal contracting rules, a company has the right to stop work if that company is risking a large amount of its own money and the government is unable to pay due to funding problems. Clearly, wartime conditions should be an exception when soldiers' lives are on the line, but there is no legal basis for a general to force a company's employees to work beyond the contracting rules. The company or its employees can stop work or go home, and there is nothing that military commanders can do about it, except seek drawn-out legal-contract remedies in the courts back in the United States.

The Army logistics contract manager and the camp's general officer faced the disaster of having to explain to their men, their superior officers, and the public that there might not be any food, water, or other vital supplies the next day because the Army didn't have a backup plan. Since the Army had outsourced these traditionally Army-provided services to one company, they did not have any choice. The Army was short of troops, so there were no back-up soldiers to take on these tasks.

Noel Is Abusing Cuba Today

After causing trouble in Haiti:

VISIBLE SATELLITE IMAGERY...RADAR IMAGERY FROM CAMAGUEY CUBA...AND SURFACE OBSERVATIONS CLEARLY INDICATE THAT THE CENTER OF NOEL REMAINS INLAND OVER EASTERN CUBA. PLENTY OF RAIN BANDS...HOWEVER...STILL EXTEND WELL AWAY FROM THE CENTER IN THE EASTERN SEMICIRCLE...CONTINUING THE HEAVY RAINS FOR HISPANIOLA THAT HAVE ALSO SPREAD INTO THE BAHAMAS. MY BEST ESTIMATE OF THE MAXIMUM WINDS IS 40 KT...WHICH WOULD MOST LIKELY BE OCCURRING IN THE BANDS BETWEEN EASTERN CUBA AND THE BAHAMAS.

A Dud Of A Year - Thankfully

Yup!

Pachelbel Rant

For your inner cellist.

Tropical Storm Noel Finally Materializes

And will affect southeastern Florida:

THE CENTER OF NOEL EMERGED OFF THE NORTHWESTERN COAST OF HAITI EARLIER TODAY...HAS SINCE BEEN MOVING NORTHWESTWARD AT ABOUT 325/13...AND IS NOW JUST NORTH OF THE EASTERN TIP OF CUBA. THE CIRCULATION CENTER WAS TOO CLOSE TO LAND FOR THE AIR FORCE RECONNAISSANCE AIRCRAFT TO FLY DIRECTLY THROUGH THE CENTER...BUT FLIGHT-LEVEL WINDS AND SURFACE PRESSURE ESTIMATES ARE CONSISTENT WITH A POSITION ESTIMATED FROM VISIBLE IMAGERY. MAXIMUM FLIGHT-LEVEL WINDS WERE 46 KT...CORRESPONDING TO ABOUT 37 KT AT THE SURFACE...WHILE SFMR ESTIMATES PEAKED A LITTLE HIGHER NEAR 50 KT. THE ADVISORY INTENSITY IS SET TO 45 KT AS A COMPROMISE BETWEEN THESE ESTIMATES. THE CENTRAL DEEP CONVECTION IS LIMITED AND THE STORM HAS A VERY SPRAWLING APPEARANCE...BUT PLENTY OF RAINBANDS EXTEND WELL TO THE EAST AND SOUTHEAST...CONTINUING TO BRING HEAVY RAINS TO HISPANIOLA.

THE MODELS HAVE PICKED UP ON THE TURN TOWARD THE NORTHWEST AND HAVE GENERALLY SHIFTED SLIGHTLY TO THE LEFT. DURING THE FIRST 48 HOURS...THE GFDL REMAINS THE EASTERN OUTLIER BUT HAS COME INTO BETTER AGREEMENT WITH THE OTHERS...WHILE THE GFS PROVIDES THE WESTERNMOST TRACK. DURING THIS PERIOD NOEL SHOULD CONTINUE GENERALLY NORTHWESTWARD TO THE SOUTHWEST OF A LOW- TO MID-LEVEL RIDGE. THEREAFTER...NOEL SHOULD BEGIN TO TURN NORTHWARD AND EVENTUALLY NORTHEASTWARD AS A FRONTAL SYSTEM APPROACHES THE SOUTHEAST U.S. COAST. THE MODELS DO NOT AGREE ON HOW SOON THIS TURN WILL MATERIALIZE AND HOW FAST NOEL WILL MOVE OUT TO SEA...PERHAPS DUE TO VARIATIONS IN THE PREDICTED VERTICAL DEPTH OF THE SYSTEM. THE OFFICIAL FORECAST TRACK IS DOWN THE MIDDLE OF THE GUIDANCE...WHICH IS A WESTWARD SHIFT FROM THE PREVIOUS ADVISORY.

Carolyn's Mom

Mom: Carolyn, we should go see a movie together. What movie do you think we should go see?

Carolyn: Mom, I think we should go see the movie "Becoming Jane".

Mom: Becoming Jane? Becoming Jane? That movie isn't about a transexual, is it? Because I don't want to see a movie about a transexual. Not that there is anything wrong with that. It's just that I don't want to see a movie about it.

Carolyn: No, mom, it's a movie about Jane Austen.

Mom: Jane Austen? Jane Austen? She isn't a transexual, is she?

Carolyn: Mom!

Dawn Of The Morlocks

Unfortunately sexual selection isn't enough to drive evolution - natural selection is required. Since everyone survives these days, there isn't that much evolution going on.

(Hope it isn't wishful thinking....)

The human race will one day split into two separate species, an attractive, intelligent ruling elite and an underclass of dim-witted, ugly goblin-like creatures, according to a top scientist.

100,000 years into the future, sexual selection could mean that two distinct breeds of human will have developed.

The alarming prediction comes from evolutionary theorist Oliver Curry from the London School of Economics, who says that the human race will have reached its physical peak by the year 3000.

DMTC Haunted House

Left: Haunted House helpers, after 11 p.m. on Saturday evening. Evident in the photo (taken by Rebecca Rudy):

At far right, Renee and David Chan, with several of their kids are far left. Left to right: Logan Petersen, in the back; Marissa, in the front; Stacy Sheehan, kneeling; Steve and Jan Isaacson; a friendly monster; Arthur Vassar; Griffin and Jon Jackson; Virginia Shaw; Chris Petersen; Dannette Vassar; Marc Valdez. In front, Turner Petersen and Andrew Lemons.

An interesting and fun time!

Since we hadn't done this before, we weren't sure how many people would come out for this. We gave ourselves a minimum target of 200, which at $5 each, would yield $1,000. We actually got 271 people, which works out to $1,355 - enough to pay for the $200 Davis Enterprise ad, plus likely the bulk of the royalties for the YPT's "A Christmas Carol."

There were four, maybe five, stages to the tour:

1.) the Main Stage, where adults and teenagers in the two evening tours were first greeted with "The Time Warp," and children and teenagers in the afternoon tour were greeted with "The Monster Mash";
2.) the Laboratory in the orchestra pit;
3.) the Pirate's Cove, in the women's dressing room;
4.) the Judge's Chamber, in the men's dressing room; and,
5.) frightening apparitions upon exit, plus games, candy, etc. for the kids in the lobby.

Trying to gauge each audience proved to be an interesting challenge. The children, in particular, proved tricky. Some kids started crying right away. In one case, a fairly-old girl, at least seven, just fell apart. Even though her slightly-older sister was enthusiastic, their mother had to abandon the Haunted House. Goodness knows we tried. We told the screaming girl that we were friendly monsters (but would you trust a monster that said it was friendly?)

I do have to say that the sight of yours truly, in particular, white-faced, looking like the Emperor Palpateen from "The Return of the Jedi," a large adult spastically hopping and dancing to the "Monster Mash," just totally creeped out the littlest kids.

Left: A friendly monster!

There was one problem I didn't appreciate until late. In a typical musical-theater evening, there might be three or four vigorous musical numbers. In this Haunted House, however, there was a Satanic kind of Ground Hog Day energy at work. We had to vigorously dance "The Time Warp" (or the "Monster Mash"), with full energy, every fifteen minutes, for four hour stretches of time. Like "Up With People," but for zombies. Sometimes we got lucky, and there were breaks, but not that many. My legs still hurt...... I'm sure Virginia and Dannette, Andrew and Chris, feel similarly.....

We had favorite groups that came in. The four teenage girls from UCD on Friday evening made us all smile. Sometimes you could tell who would be good, in advance. When teenaged screams could be heard echoing through the theater even before they were seated, you knew they would be good!
Left: The incomplete Brigadoon set was suitable as a "Time Warp" backdrop on the Main Stage.

Lighting, of course, was crucial. I particularly liked the white fluorescent light at the top of the orchestra pit exit stairs. Not only did the light perform a crucial safety function, but it tended to blind the patrons, so they could not see the imps hiding in the darkness to jump out at them after the rounded the hairpin curve to enter the Pirate's Cove.
I was in charge of the script for the Judge's Chamber, which I based on a few quotes from the movie "The Life And Times Of Judge Roy Bean."

Arthur Vassar played the Judge, I played the Bailiff, and either Jon Jackson or Jan Isaacson interjected as the tour guide. Dannette Vassar and Griffin Jackson played heads; sometimes little girls Marissa and Cassidy as well.

Once the screaming started, the script was but the spare skeleton of what was actually improvised.
Left: Treasure Chest in the Pirate's Cove.

Andrew Lemons, and either Chris Petersen or Steve Isaacson, were in charge of the Pirate's Cove.

Either John van Wort, and his son Chris, were in charge of the Laboratory, or Steve Isaacson (Steve I, the Science Guy) and Turner Petersen.
Left: Silent dummies tell no tales.

Below: Experiments in the Laboratory....


Left: The sad tale of a mutiny....


The family that came in on Sunday, in particular, had a real visual flair, and decorated the dressing rooms with lots of cobwebs and symbolic paraphernalia.


Left: The Judge likes his symbols.


Words to the Rocky Horror Picture Show's "Time Warp" (with Dannette Vassar as 'Columbia' and with Caitlin Humphreys as choreographer):

Riff Raff: It's astounding,
Time is fleeting,
Madness takes it's toll.
But listen closely . . .
Magenta: Not for very much longer
Riff Raff: I've got to keep control.

I remember doing the time warp
Drinking those moments when
The blackness within me
Riff and Magenta: And a void would be calling . . .
Let's do the time warp again.
Let's do the time warp again.

Criminologist: It's just a jump to the left
Chorus: And then a step to the right
Criminologist: With your hands on your hips
Chorus:You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane
Let's do the time warp again
Let's do the time warp again

Magenta: It's so dreamy, oh fantasy free me
So you can't see me, no, not at all
In another dimension, with voyeristic intention
Well secluded, I see all

Riff Raff: With a bit of a mind flip
Magenta: You're into the time slip
Riff Raff: And nothing can ever be the same
Magenta: You're spaced out on sensation
Riff Raff: Like you're under sedation
Chorus: Let's do the time warp again
Let's do the time warp again

Columbia: Well I was walkin down the street just havin a think
When this snake of a guy gave me an evil wink
He shooka me up, he took me by surprise
He had a pick up truck, and the devils eyes
He stared at me and I felt a change
Time meant nothin, never would again

{chorus}

The bare bones script for the Judge's Chamber follows. The actual improvisation usually involved accusing the tour guide of bodysnatching, to much protestation, who would usually reply with accusations against the audience as well. Tour guide, Undertaker Jon Jackson, would theatrically sniff blood in the audience. Jon would have also chosen a favorite target too: a giggling blonde, the smiley girl, the pointy-headed child, etc., upon whom we would focus much energy.

Interestingly, towards the end of Saturday evening, several accused members of the audience acknowledged responsibility for bodysnatching. Even though they were innocent!

It's a well-known aspect of human psychology that, when accused by someone in authority of having committed a crime, many people will confess to a crime, whether or not they actually did anything. Japanese nationalists in the late 1920's, in particular, used this tendency in the Japanese national character to frame people for false crimes, and thereby seize power. Nevertheless, I was really surprised to see this human tendency appear in this Haunted House!

Judge's Chamber Script:

(Guide brings visitors to the judge’s chambers.)

GUIDE: Hush everyone! The judge takes exception to noise!

(People file into judge’s chambers. The judge faces away, reading a large dusty book. The door closes. The Skull speaks)

SKULL: Justice is the handmaiden of law!

(Startled, the judge closes the big dusty book and turns around.)

JUDGE: Hark? Who goes there? Lawbreakers all!

Do you know who I am? IM Doom – Inferno Mellificent Doom, the hanging judge of this district! I'm very advanced in my views and outspoken. I know the law. And I have spent my entire life in its flagrant disregard. Because, in this district, I am the law, and the law is the handmaiden of justice! (Laughs eerily)

(displaying the two heads)

Here we have two wretches, one a thief and the other a liar. I couldn’t keep track who lied and who stole, so I issued a writ of habeas corpus – Latin for “I have the bodies” – until a jury can tell me who is who!

HEAD 1: (speaking of the other head) He is the liar! He lies!
HEAD 2: You lie! I'm not guilty of nothing. And you are a thief too!
HEAD 1: Liar!
HEAD 2: Thief!
HEAD 1: Liar!
HEAD 2: Thief!
HEAD 1: Liar!
HEAD 2: Thief!

JUDGE: Silence! (Thunder, then light goes off, then on) I am the judge! All stand equal before the law. And I will hang anyone for lying or thieving, without fear or favor! You will tremble at my voice and cringe at the terrible majesty of my wrath!

SKULL: Law is the handmaiden of justice!

JUDGE: You Lawbreaker!

GUIDE: Who me?

JUDGE: Bailiff, seize him! The bench recognizes you as a body snatcher!

GUIDE: Only in your service, your honor! You said yourself you have the bodies!

SKULL: Yes! Only you know where the bodies are kept.

JUDGE: Your argument is compelling! I will allow you to continue your journey, while I dspense final justice to these accused!

(As group leaves, the sound of a saw cutting through wood fills the air, together with the screams of the heads).

E. Has A Sore Throat

E.: "MMMMMAAAAAAARRRRRRCCCC!"
M.: "EERRRLLLLYYYNNNDDDAAAA!"
E.: "MMMMMAAAAAAARRRRRRCCCC!"
M.: "EERRRLLLLYYYNNNDDDAAAA!"
E.: "You're making me talk like this because you know it hurts my throat!"
M.: "EERRRLLLLYYYNNNDDDAAAA!"
E.: "MMMMMAAAAAAARRRRRRCCCC!"