Grumpy Old Man Unhappy About "Breaking Bad"

I can't blame him, actually. "Breaking Bad" tourism (which I've been doing everything to promote) has a down side for those in the immediate neighborhood of attractions. It's time to spread the love around and visit some of the less-frequented sites!

One weekend not long ago, while gardening in my front yard, I counted 20 cars stopping at Jesse’s house in one hour. Most people take photographs from across the street or the sidewalk by the house. Some especially brazen and rude people will stand under the portal by the front door to pose for a photo. If they linger, I’ve been known to call the cops. Enough is enough, already.

Tourists come in limousines and taxis. Two tour companies come by regularly, including a tour offered by Frank Sandoval and his wife, Jackie, in a 1986 Winnebago they bought in Glenwood, Ariz. It’s a dead ringer for the van Jesse and his old high school chemistry teacher, Walt, used as a mobile meth lab early in the series. It also leaks a lot of oil.

...Wasn’t it great having “Breaking Bad” filmed so close by? a tourist asked.

It was not. Huge trucks and movie equipment jammed the street for days on end. Some 12th assistant to the second unit director’s dog walker, or some such title, would knock on the door and ask us to turn down the CD player. I’d be late for work only to find the 12th assistant begging me not to start my car just yet, lest a shot be spoiled. One memorable night, “Breaking Bad” simulated moonlight outside my bedroom window until 2 a.m. Simulated movie moonlight is bright enough to give you a sunburn.

...I am distinctly in the minority on this. The day I learned “Breaking Bad” was going to simulate moonlight outside my bedroom window, I went to my neighbors to express my outrage and to ask them to revolt. No one signed up. They liked having “Breaking Bad” in the neighborhood.

At that point, I figured I could be the grumpy old man whom neighbors warn their children to avoid, or I could shut up. I shut up. Until now.