Marc Valdez Weblog: Cousin Ernie "Flintstone" Aragon's Services

Our Lady of Sorrows (OLOS) in Bernalillo, NM, where services were held for my cousin Ernie (Johnny; aka 'Flintstone') Aragon, on Tuesday, March 12, 2013.

A rosary was held on Monday night, and a service on Tuesday morning.

They included a package of Ernie's favorite snack, Oreos, in his casket. Nice!

Since Ernie was active in the Matachines dance group associated with the Church, there was a solemn dance in the central aisle too. The dancers were colorful with their bright, colorful Catholic-themed capes, carrying symbolic wooden representations of vegetation and flowers. They shook their rattles in a dirge-like rhythm.

The priest, Father Bill, wore a cream-white blanket robe that featured a geometric, Native-American-inspired ribbon-like edge to it. He was a calm, comforting presence. Nevertheless, I was disturbed by his emphasis on AA's 12-step program: he said something like it was the greatest advance in spirituality in the last century. I tried it once in similarly-modeled GA, and could see why a priest might like it: it calls upon one's childhood spiritual upbringing to restore balance to one's life. But I had a haphazard religious upbringing, and something like a 12-step program won't work for people like me. And his talk about people suffering unseen damage in life just struck me as wrong. People by nature are kind of crazy, prone to addiction, and easily bored. No need for damage to turn to addiction. Tedious Saturday afternoon TV programming is enough to do the trick. In any event, the congregation listened politely.

Father Bill concluded the service on a light note:

Today, the cardinals of the Catholic Church are meeting in Rome. Later today, or tomorrow, or Thursday, we will learn whom they have chosen to lead the Catholic Church. Do not be surprised if he chooses the name "Pope Flintstone"! Mark my words. You heard it here first!

Nice!

I wanted to say a few words regarding Ernie, but that role was reserved for others. What I would have said had I spoken would have been something like this:

I know all of you here knew Ernie at different times in his life. I knew him best as a playmate. In my mind, no matter the decade, he was always a bright, curious, energetic eight-year-old. He was five months older than I was, and always a little more robust. I looked up to him. We did things together. We spent afternoons circling our Gramita's house, over and over, precariously balanced on a thin edge of house foundation concrete. We chased the ice cream truck together. We went swimming together at the Valley High School pool in the North Valley. We helped each other out. For example, I remember once helping him with a hard task: removing a wood chip that had fallen into his eye. And he returned the favor. Once, at a birthday party following a swimming expedition, he pulled me out of a ugly mess. I was directly underneath a breaking pinata. Candy rained down on me, and every kid in the room rushed in and attacked me in order to get at the goodies.

I respect Father Bill's 12-Step message, but disagree with the idea that Ernie was 'damaged' in any way. I think it's the world that's damaged. It's easy for a bright, energetic eight-year-old to lose their way. There is sometimes a mismatch in what a person can bring to the world, and how the world responds to him. In my mind, he was always pure of heart.