"Home Improvement" Bear

I wondered at the beginning whether it was a good idea to bring these two parties together: the unlicensed plumber and the needy homeowner. But it was such a simple problem - or so it seemed. Her washing machine drain line was clogged. So, just unclog it. Right? Everyone had the purest of motives. She needed value for money. He needed money for value.

But then, there were signs the drain line itself was compromised, so they decided to dig it up and replace it. That involved days and days of hard, difficult work. (I thought it was a bad idea, because the plumber didn't have the resources to engage on such a demanding project, but by then the project had a life of its own.)

During that phase, the plumber noticed the homeowner liked to make Teddy Bears. So, he asked her to make one for himself. Something special - for the memories! Green eyes and nose; slim, not fat; no bow tie. She proceeded to start making one.

Then, signs appeared that the main sewage line itself had too many roots in it. The drill bit snapped on the rooter machine the plumber was using to attack the main sewage line. So, in addition to suspected roots, there was now a jagged object sitting in the main line that was perfectly-designed to cause clogs all by itself.

Then, the new washing machine line backed up. She stopped using most of her house's plumbing and moved into the guest house instead. Quarreling by now, the plumber and the homeowner brought the project to a standstill.

Then her next-door-neighbor, who apparently has decades of grudges against her, called the City. Apparently the plumber's chaos had caught his attention. And the plumber's dog irritated him too.

A City Inspector came over and demanded: "Where is the permit?" There was no permit. It hadn't occurred to anyone to get a permit. It never does when money and value are the objects.

He made further comments too. "This work isn't done to Code. I live just a short distance away, and will be passing by here regularly, so don't try anything underhanded. And where is this dog I keep hearing about?"

So, she was forced to pay a $274.00 fine. What a mess! And the main sewage line still requires attention!

In fact, if you gave a liberal budget to two inept people and told them to cause as much Home Improvement chaos with it as possible, you couldn't have done a better job than these two did.

(My special burden of guilt is that I brought the two of them together!)

But she follows through on her promises, bless her heart! And so, a bit late, here is the plumber's new Teddy Bear....