Lodi

Apologies to Creedence Clearwater Revival (and the "detainees," particularly if the charges are inflated or incorrect):

Just about a year ago, I set out on the road,
Seekin' my fame and fortune, lookin' for jihadist camps.
Things got bad, and things got worse, I guess you will know the tune.
Oh ! Lord, Stuck in Lodi again.

Rode in on KAL, I'll be walkin' out if I go.
I was just passin' through, must be seven months or more.
Ran out of time and money, looks like they took my friends.
Oh ! Lord, I'm stuck in Lodi again.

The man from the madrassah said I was on my way.
Somewhere I lost connections, ran out of popsicles.
I came into town, a one night stand, looks like my plans fell through
Oh ! Lord, Stuck in Lodi again.

Mmmm...If I only had a dollar, for ev'ry cone I've sold.
And ev'ry time I've had to sell while kids stood there broke.
You know, I'd catch the next plane back to where I lived.
Oh ! Lord, I'm stuck in Lodi again.
Oh ! Lord, I'm stuck in Lodi again.